Men and their self-gratification (part 2)

Men and their self-gratification (part 2)
So where was I? Yea… All eyes on me…

You know something, when you spend time with funny people, you some how become aware of each and every body part especially when the attention is on you… which I should tell you rarely happens…. 

So I started thinking about the word masturbation…  In the previous part, I had to spell it thrice to get it right… My toe nail to my hair tip all had weird emotions… All this happened in a flash of 5 secs. 

But something nice happened, they moved to the next person… maybe they never intended to ask me or realised that I was the only woman present and it might have been awkward to expect me to share or they judged my sex life… Anyway I was relieved. Just how maths teacher skips your number while checking the note book.

The evening went well… We all went back to the youtube fail videos. 
I was thinking about my man’s choice of place… Right then one of the gentlemen decided to broaden my knowledge. He said,”Archana, if you ever have a boy child.. don’t let him know that you know that he masturbates.” 

I was just a few months into my marriage and having a child was not even in my wildest of dreams. But I heard him carefully… I asked why? He said, “trust me… You shouldn’t.” The whole room somehow agreed to that point. This made me think… We talk about periods and educate men about our things and needs… shouldnt they do the same? So I told him, “I’m gonna be a cool mom… I’ll talk to him about everything… I think we should bring him up in an open environment.” 

He shook his head and when I looked around everyone was in a sic. There is something about the boy-code that I like… 
Anyway, he continued… “Archana, if he says it’s fevicol… It’s fevicol… Don’t let him know…”

It took me a few seconds to understand what he meant by fevicol.
Ohhhh fevicol!, I said.

He continued, “He is going to do it for the rest of his life and if you have a talk with him… every time he thinks about it your face will pop in his head and I’m sure you don’t want that.”

“Ewwww”, I thought and that explained everything.  
That day I realised there is so many things that we don’t know about men and we might never know… I was glad I had a friend who was free enough to share.

And that night I slept worrying about my unborn boy child. 
I couldn’t wait to share this to my cousin who has a teenager at home…

And I also wanted the world to know… I waited  for the morning…..

Men and their “self-gratification” (part 1)

Men and their “self-gratification” (part 1)

Part 1/3

This is a story that happened a few years ago. I wish I had a pen and paper to note it down or had started blogging by then.

(sighs )

This is my version of the story. Like my man always says there are 3 sides of a story… Yours, mine and the actual truth… So here we will stick to my version.

As I was saying, this happened a few months after marriage, when we had set up our new place and I was relatively comfortable with my man’s friends, now they are mine too…

In the beginning of the marriage I used to cook a lot, maybe that was my only way to be relevant in the conversations they have… I hadn’t learned to talk in punchlines and the few times that I tried they said I burned people; so I stopped.

And I followed what all mother’s advise their little girls —  that the way to the man’s heart is through his tummy…

I should tell you that all our mothers missed the point by few inches and now I know why most of the men in their 50s  are fat and unhappy. Anyway that’s a topic for another time.

Usually our friends don’t have conversations, we like watching failed videos on YouTube and chill…

But this day they decided to talk… And I don’t know how they ended up talking about masturbation.

As the only woman present there at that time I had to act cool to represent the modern woman, at the same time wrap up the entire conversation in my head…

Masturbation in the women’s world is still the forbidden fruit. I have never heard man or woman talk about it so openly in the past and I didn’t know how to handle it. I thought I can go on and on about periods but not this because I had no clue about it.

So each one in the group started sharing the weirdest place they had masturbated.

Because I love them I wouldn’t reveal any names here. I should mention that the topic didn’t make me uncomfortable at all but I was amused by the comfort these men shared.

Anyway…

X said on the top birth of the local train. That makes sense why most of the men in my family preferred the upper birth… It wasn’t chivalry…

D said forest. I understand people going to pee… This urge is beyond my understanding.

Then there was flight. Since then I judge every man that takes extra time in the airplane’s washroom…

Everything changed for me after that…

Next one took sometime and said lift… I knew he is bull-shitting… Men turn everything into a competition…

Anyway we were all sitting in a circle and after two people it was my turn… So do I have to add on, I thought.

My heart started beating fast and my head started spinning… I couldn’t keep the cool anymore. I thought I would excuse myself to check if I had left something on the gas by then they would move to the next one. The old trick you have tried in the school. “Maam may I go to the washroom”

Alas! It didn’t work coz a gentleman offered to help instead. I think he didn’t have a cool story to tell too…

Next was me… All eyes shifted to me and I freezed…

Rest to be continued….

Drunk wishes…

Drunk wishes…

Yesterday I had a quiet dinner with my parents , came back home and slept. That was my new year. It might sound sad for all the 16 year olds but for me I LOVED IT!

I woke up to this wonderful wish and a drunk promise at the end lol.

I’m glad 2018 made me meet a lot more lovely people who accept me the way I am. I’m going to cherish this for life! Thanks my City Tigers and Tigresses. Can’t wait to meet you all soon…

Wishing you all a wonderful 2019… Can’t wait to explore more!

What do you wish for 2019? Let me know in the comments below…

Lots of warm hugs and kisses

KAVI

Let’s go nude… on lips!

Let’s go nude… on lips!

Happy New Year!!!

In 2018 if I had to check the most asked questions… It would have been “What’s your favourite lip colour?” or “Can you share all our lipstick shades?”

A few months back I went through clearing my makeup and wardrobe. I’m trying to achieve a minimalistic lifestyle, lets see if I get closer to my goal in 2019. 😀

Today I’m just going to share my Favourite nude lips shades. Hope you find your perfect nude here.

Lets get started!

₹699
₹1650

These are the dupes for this shade:

PAC Retro Matte Gloss: 08 ₹550

₹1650

Dupe – Wet n Wild MegaLast Lip Color – Bare It All₹295

  • M.A.C Retro Matte – Burnt Spice https://bit.ly/2LF1Qnk
    Dupes Makeup Revolution Retro Luxe Matte Lip Kit echelon (Rs 950)
₹1900
₹1500

Dupes – wet n wild sandstorm

₹599
₹599
₹1050
₹1650
₹1100

Letter (001)

Letter (001)

30. 12. 2018

Dear Y

I always loved the idea of having a pen friend but it never worked out. So here I’m writing things I want to tell you and for convenience you will be called Y. You can reply to me by pressing the contact button above.

So for past few days I felt extremely low… yes it was that time of the month too. I was so miserable that I was about to delete my Instagram account. I had to tell myself to hold on for a week and if I feel the same we’ll think about it and I listened to myself. 

I know people don’t prefer showing their real, maybe sad things on social media. I don’t want to do that anymore…

Every time someone messages me, Oh you are so cute and full of energy… I love your life… I think to myself am I always cute and happy? My friends and family might differ… I can be as mean as Ursula and as dull as Droopy dog but they still manage to exist around me…

I was thinking I’ll share my thoughts and other fluffs here coz I know a lot of people hate reading, me being one of them. So I was thinking, that the 5 people who are reading this and are interested in being my pen friend, can write back to me… what say? 

Anyway think about it and let me know…

Hope you have a wonderful 2019.

Let me know how you are spending your New Year… I might be just keeping myself warm under the blanket and watching something on the Netflix.

Lots of love

Archie 

Recap 2018

Recap 2018

The year I turned 30. The birthday I was looking forward to but ended by falling sick.


2018 was a year that made me realise, how much I was taking things for granted…
That humanity exists;  and that Kerala has this crazy spirit that’s difficult to explain.

That there is a thin line between being conservative and sexist.

We had World cup this year and a lot of true lovers of the sport were sad for Messi and Ronaldo.
I don’t follow any sports but I could feel their pain.

Mary Kom proved again she can land a punch six times. She has made us proud!


This year I wrote a few campaigns… and realised my love for writing…
Some things worked as planned and some that I desperately wanted to work, didn’t.
Malayalam cinema made gems again this year.

couldn’t add all of them.

We were hit by Nipha virus and in 40 days we conquered it.We found new heroes, witnessed a love story that’s never seen before.

Lini
Lini’s letter to her husband

“Sajeeshetta I’m almost on the way. I don’t think I’ll be able to see you. Sorry. Please look after our children well. Take the children to the Gulf. Please don’t be alone like our father. Please. With lots of love…. Umma.”

This is the most romantic and painful letter I have ever read.

We thought we were back on track… but the flood gates opened.

The world witnessed the story of humans. We found new heroes again.

fishermen- the real heroes


People who are close to me know how much I love my family… but for the first time I felt it wasn’t enough. I spent a whole month with family…

This year I went to my school as a chief guest for the play fest… All Xavierians out there will understand how important it is…

Play fest 2018, with my teachers.

In my school we only have best performance award… It doesn’t matter if it’s an actor or an actress…  They made equality so simple.


This year taught us no one can fight a battle alone… it’s very easy to turn around and point a finger at that one courageous lonely person… But thanks to a few women who gave courage to a lot of women to come out and say it’s not okay… 


My heart reaches out to the men who are confused and want to have a conversation. Let’s talk…It’s time to do what’s right.

Now talking about what’s right… I think as a state we shouldn’t forget the love we had during the flood.


That was our true symbol of unity.
Anyway 2018, Abish had his first one hour special on amazon…

Abish’s stand-up special.
Go watch it! He is roasting me… 🙂

and yeah this was also the year of weddings…

I thank 2018 for all the learning and I hope 2019 we would make use to it.